Monday, January 11, 2010

To live & to learn..n to experience

"Searching for the thrill of it, thrill of it...say that its love but to me its looking counterfeit, i get done with one and move right on to another b*&#@$.." -mr.taylor gang himself (Wiz khalifa) for u lames

Haha this sad lil truth for most guys right, but there is one in particular that i know that wears this crown all may know have seen him,maybe freinds or partnas wit um ;0

I once met a guy who was one of the finest things to me, (a true BMW)..
somewhat rare to stumble upon (an unlikely pair we once were n still are)
no one would ever really know/ understand hell i neva did n still dont till this day
But that BMW to me turned into a 98 toyota corrola..unfortunatley

He had it all..and in some ways he still does:
Looks, game, swagger, appeal, a lil cash?, real confident, talented individual
but at times a lil too confident for his own good
From the many things i hear, he was once a real good man for "one" girl,
but now hes that man not just for that "one" but for many girls as well
I'd be lying if i said some of his qualities didnt impress me, they did
just not all of them, i couldve lived w/o a few

I knew he wasnt totally good, and that i would never really
get what i wanted from it or much less say everything i wanted to
.. but come on guys will be guys
and you know what your getting into if you so choose to with certain ones
I made a big girl decision which inturn had big girl consequences
Regret,nope everything is a learning experience to me
I ignored my conscience for a sec n let my curiosity
become the death of me for a moment.....

Did i think i was special. at the time? i did..but i knew
if i truely was things would be totally different
So was i just "another B&%*@$?"
No matter how i let myself fall a bit...i tried to keep a guard up as well
Never let on to my true feelings n prolly never will
Some things are better left unsaid..especially when you
know its a loss cause

I can only hope that his past, present, and future preys
are as smart and keep their guard up..You gotta be on
your A game and know what your dealing with, if not
get out the game now bc thats really all it is sweetheart
i really hate to tell you..get engulfed in a river of lies and
drown in a sea of false promises that will never become true
life boats to save your ass

Why deny it..he never did
I heard things about new chicks n the "one"
after it all,, hell i still do but are you going to do
Move on..n thats exactly what i did

Theres so much that i could say
about the situation n what happened
with the one; things i know
he doesnt know that i know
about the "one" n the others
but putting ppl on blast is not my
overall objective or goal in this
blog, its just to let out what
i cant normally get out
to certain indiviauls
n let my true thoughts take control
But just know that i know a lot
more than i appear to
always two steps ahead

But on the flip side:
I kinda stumbled into sumthn new
sumthn i was inneed of sumthn i
deserved after many failed attempts of wondering n asking y me?..
Im'still scared and a lil
guarded but willing to learn and let
go n finally be happy:)

This relationship is like no other
unique in its own weird funny n twisted way
. bc i actually feel special this time
no lies, no games, no confusion, no false hope
Its right there waiting for me to reach out and
take it and run with it~

A happy ending after all???

1 comment:

  1. "Interesting?",said the tortured soul to the cpmplicated soul. "How so?" asked the compicated soul an the tortured soul said, "becuz u have found your happy ending!!!!!!!!!" LoL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! a nice blog once again